What's New?

It's been two weeks of my life being entirely taken over by that work project I mentioned a few weeks ago. It went better than I expected, actually. I'm unhappy with the results and I knew that would be the case before we even began. In fact, I think pretty much everyone involved is unhappy with the finished product. The problem stems from a poor management decision made by someone that doesn't even work there anymore. In fact, that person was forcibly removed. I suppose sunk cost fallacy is to blame for keeping the project going after he was kicked to the curb. Bad decision making was always his hallmark. The most obvious being the fact that he drove a hummer over 100 miles daily to get to work just to show off. Customers and staff alike are united in their disdain for the garbage I helped make happen on his behalf. I wonder how management will address this, if at all. The remaining management are mostly competent people and I like working with them. Hell, I consider some of them to be family in an abstract way. I guess that might be why I'm disappointed? I don't know.

So yeah, I made a shitload of money, but I learned nothing. I don't own any of this and did it at the expense of the things I do own. Furthermore, I didn't learn anything useful from the process. Nobody on the outside team responsible for assisting us was any help. Quite the opposite in fact, they actively hindered us. Repeatedly. Most of them were disrespectful and seemingly lacked in knowledge. Their "tech guy" was full of crap and it was clear he barely understood what was going on. Then, when the project wasn't even truly finished, everyone split. It's still not finished, frankly, but my part in it is over.

I don't know how long I'll live. When this started, the President of the United States was threatening NATO. I didn't know if we'd survive long enough to see the end of it. Confidence stems from risk assessment rather than blind faith. You can never truly know whether you're right, and I was, thankfully. Still, I'm tired. All I want is peace and I want to spread it to everyone.

Yesterday, things were going wrong and one of the outside teams members mentioned how calm I was. I mean, yeah, of course I'm calm. Why lose my temper when I can simply try again? That's what I mean by spreading peace. She mentioned that she felt better because I kept my cool. Objectively, that was my only success the entire project. I followed directions and completed my tasks, made the head honchos happy, and played my part.That's not success, that's doing what's expected of me. Helping that old lady feel comfortable during a bad moment without really doing anything is true success.